The wrong reasons to preserve our marriage. Part 2



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Another thought that bothers the couples when they consider getting divorced is how it could affect their children. It is for sure a huge change in their lives and it can not be accepted very easy. The divorce should be well deliberated and such a new situation should be brought in with empathy, insight and discussion with the children.

 

Despite all, many people consider the option of getting divorced and giving up on making such a step in their lives because of their children. They want to protect them from living with only one parent, but at the same time, they forget about the fact that their children might witness too many fights and conflicts between their parents in case they decide to preserve their marriage. Children accept as a role model their parents’ behavior.

We are sure that every parent wants the best for his child. And despite of that fact, if we let our children grow up in such continual frustration, we risk ruining their future marriage too. Even worse – many parents do not realize that children notice that there is something wrong in the relationship between their mother and father.

The irony is that eventually those children will start associating marriage with frustrating and conflict phenomenon. We at least have to teach our children that some marriages can not last and can not be preserved. In this way we could give them a chance to learn from our mistakes and try to achieve something better in their future marriage.

 

  • How to be better parents?

 

In order to be as good as possible, we need to serve as a role model in their lives. We should live our life by dealing with all our problems and challenges with no fear. Isn’t that what we want them to do too? If we choose to preserve our marriage, we need to do anything possible to make it better and create a working model which could be acquired by our children.

 

If there is no chance for a happy denouement in our marriage, we need to get over our fears and get divorced. Let’s not justify ourselves that we are protecting our children while we are actually making them witness our conflicts. We should face our fears, accept them and choose to preserve our marriage, only if we have enough hope that it will get better and if we are willing to do anything to make it better. Preserving it because we have given up the idea of a happier life is for sure not a warrantable reason.



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